June 29, 2010 by Tom Collins 474 views 6,986  

How To Screw Up A Facebook Relationship In Four Easy Steps.

It feels like Junior High all over again.  Everyone seems desperate for people to like them. Only this time, the schoolyard happens to be the social media hangout, Facebook and it’s not necessarily the pimply pre-pubescent kid, but local and national businesses.

What happens when everyone likes you?  Is there a race to see who’ll have the most “fans” or “likes?”  If so, I must have missed the memo or one of thousands of blog posts from various social media experts.  What exactly will you win?  A better question yet, will having the most “fans” or “likes” make your business the most profitable, successful company and the envy of all other businesses on Facebook?  I doubt it.  So what is this phenomenon really about?

“Like us, and ask all of your friends to like us, and ask all of your friends friends to like us, etc. and one person will win something of very little value, but we’ll make it sound like it’s invaluable.”

OK, this is not an actual quote, but one that you’ll probably recognize since you may receive something like it several times a day on your wall.  I guess in my naiveté I must have fallen for the trap before and now I suffer from the incessant pleas for friendship or “likes.”  Well, I’m sure I’m not alone in saying it’s time to end this relationship. “Keep your tchotchke and your posts that are littering my wall like bad graffiti.”  Consider yourself de-friended!
Now, it’s not all bad, and some companies have a well-thought out strategy for acquiring new “fans/likes” along with a communication strategy to build relationships, not turn them off and end up defriended.

Here are four things not to do, unless your ultimate goal is to turn people off and get them to defriend your business.

1. Don’t buy into the theory that “he with the most fans/likes wins.”  Steer clear of companies that sell fans/likes to boost your numbers and give you something to boast about.  What value do these purchased fans/like give you in the end?

2. Don’t come across as desperate and beg for more friends.  It didn’t work in high school when you were trying to get a date, and it won’t work now.  People are turned off by desperation.

3. Don’t do the daily gimmick question of the day disguised as market research to try to engage conversation.  I’m surprised someone hasn’t asked me to “click like if you like breathing air.”  Again, what value do I receive as a fan?

4. Don’t litter.  Remember the old television spot with the American Indian shedding a tear when he saw litter floating in the river?  Don’t think your fans/likes won’t shed a tear when they open their facebook wall and see worthless posts littering their private rivers of information.  And despite what you may think, the chance to be one of several thousand fans/likes who may win a free order of French Fries from McDonald’s is not going to stop me from defriending you!

It’s not a finite list, and each of us has an experience or a “don’t” to add to the list.  Consider the following as you navigate your business and build relationships on Facebook:

1. If you live by the numbers, you’ll die by the numbers.  To my knowledge, there is no prize for having the most. Remember quality is more important than quantity.  Rent-a-friends or people who like you because their cousin three times removed recommended they like you for a chance to win something have no real value.

2. People will like you for your true self.  Be true to your brand and operate in the social media space the same as you have been in the outside world.

3. Gimmicks may work for a while, but have you thought about what will happen once everyone tires of the chance to win something or being asked banal questions? Consider the true value your brand can offer instead.

4. At a certain point, FREE offers become meaningless clutter that our eyes become trained to bypass. What happens when giveaways and freebies don’t cut it any longer? Again, offer something free, but make it something your fans/likes will appreciate like resources and links tied to your brand’s specialty.

5. Have fun.  Loosen up and exercise your brand’s personality.  If your brand is friendly or likeable, don’t’ be a stuffed shirt.  No one likes the uber serious guy at the party. They’re likely to be hanging around the fun guy.

Practice a little common sense when approaching the Facebook/social media space.  Put yourself in the shoes of your fans/likes and ask the question “would I like to see posts like these everyday?”  and what real value can I offer to endear my true fans/likes that will lead to greater success.


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